Thursday, October 29, 2009
Constant Reminders
It's so difficult, painful, and frustrating that even the smallest things remind me of something that I'm trying desperately to forget. An innocent comment by a friend, a book on a desk. And these are the things that linger; it's impossible to shake them once they're in my head.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Musings On Photography
Today, I walked. I just set out without direction, without a plan, without any thought beyond "I have to keep moving." And I ended up here.
The Ben Frankin Bridge has always been one of my favorites - if not my absolute favorite - landmark in Philadelphia. I think that part of it stems from the project that I made in 12th grade physics, where we made models of bridges out of balsa wood, and competed to see how much weight they could hold before breaking apart (my bridge came in 3rd in the state).
Then there was the elective course that I took as a senior in college on the evolution of structural engineering and the relationship to how bridges are built. That's where I became familiar with and fascinated with the Golden Gate Bridge, the Tacoma Narrows Bridge, and of course, the Ben Franklin Bridge. I learned about the architectural and aesthetic challenges that the architects designing those bridges faced. I also learned about the profound social and economic impacts that new bridges had on the communities that used them.
I honestly think that in another life, I was a civil engineer or something, because to this day, I let out a little gasp every time I see it, and my eyes are locked onto my bridge. The Ben Franklin. It reminds me of home. It reminds me of where I've been, and where I'm going next.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
About those photos
I'm still working on the Photo of the Day project, but I might not have a photo for *every* day. But, everywhere I go, I I look at things differently now. There are a lot of pictures out there, just some that aren't worth looking at.
Detangling
I have taken for granted the way that this "digital age" makes it so easy for people to stay connected. Keeping up with friends through Facebook, Twitter, their blogs (via a feed reader, of course), Flickr and the like makes information about anyone available through a variety of sources. And then add the corresponding iPhone or Blackberry apps - the ever-present devices where one can text, check e-mail, or even call to keep in touch - and you can find out anything about anyone, anytime. That's great when you want to keep in touch with where people are and what they're doing, but when you don't necessarily want to, it becomes really hard to disentangle yourself from the constant stream of information about them (seriously, G, I don't need to know the minutiae of every single second of your day through Facebook, your Gmail chat status, and Twitter). It's sensory overload; it almost necessitates total radio silence so that you don't have to think about which feeds into what, or that this syncs with that... It's enough to make one long for pre-smartphone days, when you weren't linked to everything, and where you didn't have access to everything all of the time. So I think I'm going to go back to an earlier time. No more Tweeting. No more Facebook. No more Google Chat. No more following blogs on the sly. I'm going to go back to the tried and true phone call (and e-mail) to keep in touch with people.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Realization
Despite the difficulty of the last week or so, I'm sure that I've made the right decisions. I'm more confident that I did the right thing for all involved. There's still a sadness that I don't think will ever go away, but it's a deep, dull ache, rather than the sharp debilitating pain that I felt before.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
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