Quote of the Day, 12/30/2010

This one's a little different today. It's not from a famous author, philosopher, historian or poet. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm constantly delving into what it means to be a person of faith, and how most faiths share some fundamental tenets. So I think this is one of the truest statements I've ever read, and even though it's taken out of context, it's nonetheless true and universally applicable to all faiths, all nationalities, and all orientations (in my mind, anyway).

Anything that does not promote love is not of God. Instead of arguing, let us love one another, even those with whom we disagree. This is God's message to us. Nothing else matters.

-Rev. Candace Chellew-Hodge

Quote of the Day,

I have found that most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.

— Abraham Lincoln

Merry Christmas, and Photo of the Day!

Quote of the Day, 12/22/2010

Contemplate the extent and stability of the heavens, and then at least cease to admire worthless things.

— Boethius

(Another) Post of the Day

"The man is richest whose pleasures are the cheapest."
 
 — Henry David Thoreau

Quote of the Day

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.

-Anaïs Nin

Quote of the Day, 11/29/2010

A multitude of small delights constitute happiness.

-Charles Baudelaire

Photo of the Day, 11/14/2010

Posing with the instructor of my lace edging class from today (Franklin Habit, if anyone is curious)!! SUCH a sweet guy!






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Photo of the Day, 11/10/2010

(So what if it's a few days late...)

I love my school!







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Quote of the Day, 11/10/2010

It's never too late to be who you might have been.

-George Eliot

PotD, 11/1/10

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Photo of the Day, 10/11/2010

On my way home from work.






















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Photo of the Day, 10/5/2010

Seen in the middle of Walnut St. (between 12th and 13th) at 5:30 pm. Everyone is dancing to the song "Run Around Sue."

I love this city!





















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Photo of the Day, 10/2010

Wait... It's OCTOBER??

I thought this was really pretty.






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All Dogs Go to Heaven

People who are pet owners generally recognize that their animals' life spans are shorter than humans', but that doesn't make it any easier when one of our furry friends goes to the "happy hunting grounds" in the sky. And for so many of us, our pets are such ubiquitous presences in our lives that they are just as important -- if not more important in some cases -- as our parents, siblings and other relatives.

Today, I was saddened to hear of the passing of my friend A's beloved pooch Molly. I think that I've always felt some sort of pet-owner kinship with A and her husband because they loved and adored their furry baby just as much as I've loved all of mine, especially Uno (who will always hold the title of 'Sweetest and Best Dog EVER' for me). For a lot of people, the passing of ones' pet is a sad experience, but for A, and for me, it's something that never leaves you.

Some pets are such special, unique, one of a kind creatures that when they die, a void is left inside your heart that can never be re-filled. Which is not to say that future pets aren't showered with just as much love and affection and ear scratches and doggie treats. Just, some leave such an impression that you can't ever forget how special they were.

So, rest in peace sweet Molly. I know she's at the dog park in the sky, chasing squirrels and barking at the mailman with Uno.

Phanatic Around Town: Just Under the Wire

The Phanatic Around Town exhibit ends this week with each statue being auctioned off. So, on Thursday and Sunday I roamed Old City to gather the last few pictures. So without further ado...

Independence Hall Visitors Center

















National Constitution Center

















Franklin Square

















Seaport Museum

















 Betsy Ross House

















Philadelphia Zoo


















Aaaaand - project complete!

Now, what's next?

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orthoepy: Dictionary.com Word of the Day

Incorrect pronunciations of (fairly) common words drives me up the wall. It's one of my biggest grammar/vocabulary/English language pet peeves.

orthoepy: Dictionary.com Word of the Day: "orthoepy: the study of correct pronunciation."

Photo of the Day, 8/17/2010

I saw this as I was zooming by in a cab. I'll have to take a walk by some time after work to adequately capture the art deco amazingness of the facade.






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Phanatic Around Town, Special Edition

This is the Phanatic bobblehead giveaway from Stitch n Pitch last week. Many, many thanks to JK and JM for picking him up for me since I couldn't go!



















BTW, please note that he's knitting!


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Phanatic Around Town, Citizens Bank Park & Piazza at Schmidts in Northern Liberties

I took both of these photos a long time ago and somehow forgot to post.

The one at the ballpark is behind glass, so there's a little bit of a glare.

At CBP...




















...and at the Piazza.




















 Just 6 more to go. I'll be able to bust out 5 at the same time, though, since they're all in the same vicinity.


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Photo of the Day, 8/12/2010

New neighborhood mural!







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Quote of the Day, 8/5/2010

If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.

-Booker T. Washington

Photo of the Day, 8/3/2010

How could I never have noticed this statue and clock right above the Tiffany's store on Walnut Street?!




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Photos of the Day, 7/31/2010

Cuteness squared! I spent the day visiting my adorable goddaughter K and her baby sister S. They are both such hams! A special bonus is that I just happened to be there when S started taking her first steps (using K's toy stroller as a support)! It was amazing watching her discover her new skills!

And K is so very funny. She manages to sort of make jokes (in the way that only a 2 year old can do!) and crack herself up. She can also get her way by just smiling, which cracked us grownups up.

Anyway, they're both so sweet, funny, loving, unique, and full of personality, and I'm beyond happy that I could spend the day with them!





(At the library)












(At the playground - K's going to be a rock climber!!)
















(Practicing walking at home)
















(Getting used to the slide at the playground)













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Photo of the Day, 7/30/2010

Hahahahahaha!





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Phanatic around Town, African-American Museum of Philadelphia

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Le sigh.

Today isn't a great day. I woke up sleep deprived because my inability to get to sleep at a reasonable time got the better of me. Then I came to work only to have to say goodbye to the person who has probably become my closest work friend. Another friendship is starting to fall apart, and there doesn't seem to be anything that I can do to fix it.

I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed by the amount of work and non-work WORK that I have to do. And of course I'm feeling more and more and more anxious about my mom's health. Despite what her doctor keeps saying, I don't see any signs of improvement.

And then when I decide to finally stop ignoring yet another whole universe of people, I see something that I really wish I hadn't, because I think it's ruined my day even further.

And on top of all that, my friend's dad had a stroke and is in the hospital, and I feel almost as though he's my own dad. And just like with my mom, I feel completely helpless and ineffective.

I'm just having a really, really, really bad day, and I want nothing more than to curl up in my bed and go to sleep and let the rest of the day drift away.

Quote of the Day

Philanthropy is almost the only virtue which is sufficiently appreciated by mankind.

-Henry David Thoreau

Quote of the Day

Happiness, knowledge, not in another place but this place, not for another hour but this hour.

-Walt Whitman

All Good Things Must Come to an End

Despite my mom being sick, I've enjoyed quite a few weeks of relatively upbeat spirits. That's over, though, and I feel a wave of sadness overtaking me, and as much as I'm trying to fend it off, I can't.

And what stinks is that I saw it coming. There have been a couple of developments over the last couple of weeks that have combined to make me feel so blue. And I suppose all I can do now is just ride it out. These things always pass. The only question is, how long will it take?

Phanatic Around Town, Lloyd Hall/Boathouse Row

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Photo of the Day, 7/4/2010

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Photo of the Day, 6/30/2010

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More Phanatic Around Town, Philadelphia International Airport

I've had these photos for a couple of weeks, but I hadn't gotten around to posting them. Many thanks to Jaime and Tara who were kind enough to photograph the Phanatic (separately), since it was inside the concourse. Without further ado...









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Photo of the Day, 6/25/2010

Posts stuck in the sidewalk from old parking meters put to good use (Walnut St).





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What Are You Grateful For?

I just saw that question asked on a blog that I read, and it really made me think. Health emergencies and difficult personal times always make one think about life, etc., but I have a really hard time remembering or reminding myself of the things that I'm grateful for or that make me happy.

Of course, I'm thankful that my mom's getting better. There's a long road ahead of us, but she's getting better, so that's all that I can hope for. I'm also realizing that it'll take her a long time to fully recover, so every bit of progress is an accomplishment.

And I'm also thankful for the time that I spent on Saturday taking pictures. I've been neglecting the things that bring me joy lately, but I've realized that if I let myself indulge in them a little bit, All of the difficult things that I have to deal with afterward so much more manageable. I didn't take any phenomenally good photos, but that wasn't the point. It was to get out and about, and spend a few minutes paying attention to my surroundings rather than my mom's health or other things that stress me.

So those are the things that I am thankful for. I've tried unsuccessfully before to keep a gratitude journal, but I'm going to try to refocus on remembering these things even if I don't necessarily write it down every day.

Edited to add: One thing that I'm going to get back on is my Phanatic photo series. One pic to come soon...

Mom, an Update, Part 3

Mom came home yesterday. They performed a procedure on Monday called a kyphoplasty, in which they inserted a balloon into the area of her spine with the compression fracture, expanded the space, and then injected some sort of cement into it. Other than some minor ache-y-ness from the procedure itself (they performed it laproscopically), she felt a million times better just 2 hours after the procedure. She may need some physical therapy, since she's been on her back for over a week, but that's pretty easy to deal with. She'll also start treatment next week, and we'll see where it goes from there.

I don't know why I can't put it into writing, but I can't. I can say it, I have no problem saying that word, but seeing it written in black and white is still a little too much for me right now.

Photo of the Day, 6/8/2010

I stole this idea from Tracey.

Baby H feet!





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Thank You

It's been a difficult week for me, and there will be more difficult times to come, but so many people have been so incredibly thoughtful, supportive and kind. I never realized how much a call, email, text, or a walk could make me feel so much better. So to all of you - and you know who you are - THANK YOU.


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Mom, an update part 2

More test have been done. She's been poked and prodded and scanned and poked some more. Now we have results. They're not the results that we wanted. So now we have to figure out the next steps. I think I'm still a little stunned by it all.


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Mom, an Update

My mother is still in the hospital. Her Calcium levels have gone down to an acceptable level, but she still has a really high heartrate and some difficulty breathing due to all of the fluids that they were giving her to bring down the Ca. She's been poked and prodded and stuck with needles over and over again. They changed her pain meds because what she was on was making her incredibly lethargic. Now, she's less lethargic, but the pain is a little more intense, and now she's developed a fever.

After our family meeting on Monday, I was designated as the healthcare contact person for my mom's care. I'm sure that the nurses are sick of me at this point, since I'm constantly asking them "why" and "what's next" and "what were the results of [whatever] test." I wanted this responsibility because I need to know what's going on. Considering that this situation is still fraught with questions and uncertainty, knowing what the doctors and nurses are doing every single step of the way is my only way of keeping some semblance of control. And, I just hate the not knowing part. But things are starting to make sense from a medial standpoint, so that's a relief. There's still so much that has to happen before my mom will be ok (or even ok enough to go home), but I am relieved to know that there's some sort of a plan.

Now I'm exhausted - physically and mentally. My muscles actually ache as if I've just had a strenuous workout. I went to work today just to get a break from spending every waking minute at the hospital with my mom. And if I'm not there, I (or my sister M) is at the house checking in on Dad, doing laundry, etc. Oh yeah, and we've been calling friends and family to postpone Saturday's surprise birthday fete for my soon-to-be-septuagenarian father. For now, I'm going to try and get some sleep, and hope that I can actually sleep through the night, which is a luxury that I haven't had in forever. Sigh. And ZZZZZZZ.......

Mom

My mom is sick. What was originally thought to be a pulled muscle in her back turned to be a broken vertebrae in her back. So she's been walking around for about a month in all sorts of pain. But that's the least of it. Since she didn't fall or experience any trauma, one has to wonder how it happened. There are several reasons why bones spontaneously break, and she'll be in the hospital for several days until the doctors figure out what the reason is.

Anyone who knows me knows that my mom and I have had our difficulties, but seeing her laying in a hospital bed makes me so afraid that I won't have time to make up for being a difficult daughter.

I've spent the last 2 days trying to make sure I have all of the current information from the doctors, making sure my dad is ok in the house by himself and is eating, trying to figure out "what's next."

So... yeah. There are so many "what if"s, and I am just having a tough time thinking about all of them. I've already established myself as the strong, taking charge one, but in reality, it's taking everything I have in me to not collapse into a fit of hysterics in front of everyone.

I don't know what I'm going to do. Except go to sleep so that I can head over to the hospital first thing in the morning.


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Photo of the Day, 5/28/2010

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Photo of the Day, 5/18/2010

Doing my civic duty.




(I forgot to post this yesterday!)

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Photo of the Day, 5/17/2010

A study in contrasts.







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Falling into place, finally

I haven't written here in a while. I've been hesitant from the very beginning to completely bare my heart and soul on a blog that anyone, anywhere could read. I thought it would be a good way for me to force myself to really think about the things that have been weighing on me over the last few months and years.

What I've realized, though, is that it's almost impossible to be completely open and honest here (or anywhere, for that matter). To lay bare all of the thoughts and worries that weigh on me would be to contradict what I've been saying to the people who care about me for months - that I'm fine and that I'm doing well. I've even gone so far as to stop seeing my friends because I don't want to give away the slightest hint that I'm not OK. And I've convinced myself that they don't want me around anyway, because I'm such a drag.

So now, I'm often painfully and frighteningly lonely. It's feeling that comes and goes in waves, some that feel like they're crushing me, but most of which seem to lap at my ankles. My only option is to just deal. I knew what I was getting into when I made the decisions that I did, and I can't go back on that now. I never thought that I'd say that I'm inherently a social creature, but I am. So to not be surrounded by friends and activity is difficult for me. But this new life is my choice. I have been pretty good at making the best of it, but it's still a difficult adjustment sometimes. So I am OK these days. I've picked up some new hobbies and resurrected a couple of old ones. I revel in being out and enjoying the spring weather. I think I still need a little more time to adjust, but things are falling into place now.

Phanatic Photopalooza (aka Photos of the Day, 4/29/2010)

At the Kimmel Center...





At Paine Plaza...





At 15th & Market...





At the Comcast Center...





At the Franklin Institute...





...aaaand at the Free Library of Philadelphia!




Whew!

P.S. Why could I not find the one located the closest to me - at the Art Museum?

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Photo of the Day, 4/24/2010

The Phillie Phanatic at Rittenhouse Square!






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Photo of the Day, 4/18/2010

The Phillie Phanatic at the Please Touch Museum!





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Travel Goals

I always thought that it was interesting that people I knew wanted to achieve the goal of traveling to every single continent, or every state in the US, or whatever may have interested them. And while It would be nice to say that I'd been to every continent, It's far more important to me to visit quite a few destinations, several of which are on the same continent, or on a continent that I've already visited.

Then an article about the statue of Christ the Redeemer in Rio caught my eye. I've always thought that it's an absolutely fascinating object, and I've always wanted to visit it. I realized that it's on the list of the New 7 Wonders of the World!

I also started thinking about how I've always been fascinated by the Seven Ancient Wonders, to the extent that I took a class in undergrad about translating the basic themes of the ancient wonders into modern times, and studying how things like the first subways, skyscrapers, dams, and suspension bridges were marvels in their own right, because many of them were constructed without any of the tools that are in use today, like motor-controlled engines, electrical lines, cranes, etc.

So the Modern Wonders... THAT'S MY LIST! Everything on the list is something that I've wanted to visit anyway. This is so cool! Despite the fact that I have no really, immediate travel plans, it's a starting point, and I'm suddenly so very excited!!

The wonders are:
Giza Pyramid Complex in Cairo Egypt (the only remaining Ancient Wonder, and probably my first destination)
Chichen Itza in Yucatan Mexico (my parents have already been there)
Christ the Redeemer in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
The Colosseum in Rome, Italy
The Great Wall of China
Machu Picchu in Cuzco, Peru
Petra in Jordan (maybe I could go here at the same time I go to Egypt)
Taj Mahal in Agra India (since everyone who knows me knows that I've been obsessed with India, this destination clearly would be one of the first that I'd go to)

So, who's with me? I'm thinking Egypt in summer 2010. Where to next?

Photo of the Day, 4/15/2010

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Photo of the Day, 4/14/2010

Anyone who knows me remotely well knows that I love my high school. So much that I've been on the Alumnae Board for about 6 years now.

Today I amazingly had enough time after a doctor appointment to get to Baldwin a little early for my monthly board meeting. And as I was meandering down the hall looking at some of the student artwork, class projects, and sports updates, I noticed this mosaic.

This mosaic is made up of tiles from each of the members of the class of 2014. It was made 2 years ago, and each tile shows the students' personalities and hobbies and beliefs, and as I was looking at it, I saw the diversity in the student body. Some were musicians, some were athletes, some wrote bible verses, and some wrote in other languages. And then in the middle is the symbol that shows that - despite these differences -they are still all Baldwin girls.




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Crisis of Faith

One would have to be living under a rock the last couple of weeks (actually, the last decade or two) to not know that there's a serious crisis going on within the Catholic church. Particularly over the last couple of weeks, I have been struggling to comprehend what I feel about the Catholic church. While sexual abuse by priests is (beyond unfortunately) nothing new, the more and more I hear about these crimes, the more I question the men charged with guiding the Church.

I am a practicing (for the most part) Catholic, although I've always disagreed with some of the tenets of the Church's teachings. I have always been able to look at issues like homosexuality, abortion, contraception, and so many other hot-button issues as topics that I could disagree with the Church about, but still be able to retain my belief and faith in the core values of what the Church teaches us.

Particularly in the weeks leading up to Easter, I had a really difficult time thinking about the significance of the holiday. I couldn't go to church because I'm starting to question the sincerity - the holiness - of the priests who lead the Mass. How can I possibly rely on the leaders of the Church to set the example for me to follow if there's no guarantee that they're leading a Christ-like life?

While I completely understand and believe that there are far, far more good priests than there are pedophile priests, but the growing evidence that for decades, these criminals have been sheltered from prosecution, allowed to continue ministering to their parishes, and have NOT been defrocked sickens me. I wonder what roles the priests that I have respected and admired in the past have played - if any - in this debacle. Father L., my childhood parish priest, the one who baptized me? What about my priest in college, Father R., who served as a grandfatherly figure to so many of his college parishioners. And Cardinal B., who I considered a giant among men. And finally, JPII. A pope who I had the good fortune to bless me not once, but twice. The first of those two times, he actually placed his hand on my head to bless me as my mother held her baby up to him.

But did he play an active role in protecting these priests? What did he know? How could these holy men, the leaders of my faith, decide that protecting these horrible priests was more important than protecting children in the church? How could COVERING THIS UP help the church and its parishioners more than making an example of these criminals and showing that the church that professes to protect the vulnerable actually abides by that philosophy?

One of the other, really terrible side-effects of this is that I wonder if the priesthood was really the right choice for my college friend who is now Father G. While I know that he entered the priesthood with the purest of hearts, the purest of intentions, and a strong desire to both learn more and teach others about his faith, I worry that a dark cloud hangs over him, as one hangs over all of the other GOOD priests in the world. I feel as though I'm losing faith in my religious leaders. And that's not the way that I want to feel. Faith is supposed to give you peace, make you stronger, give you something that you know you can rely on. And I can't do that anymore.

For me, this isn't a debate about whether priests should be allowed to marry, or whether women should be allowed to be priests. That really has nothing to do with it. Rather, it's all about how the Church as an institution has made a massive failure out of its attempts to hold pedophile priests accountable for  their actions, both spiritually AND legally. The Church has lost the trust of its followers all over the world, and this is a trust that they'll never be able to get back. And I therefore find myself in the terrible position of trying to figure out what this means for me. I've been asking myself that question for quite some time now, and I'm still nowhere near an answer or solution. Maybe what I do is just bypass the 'intermediaries' and just seek guidance and peace from the man upstairs myself.

Photo of the Day, 4/9/2010

I think this might be my earliest PotD yet!

This is what I saw when I walked out my door this morning. THIS is why I love spring!




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